In honor of autumn and life in general, one of my favorite poems by Robert Frost:
NOTHING GOLD CAN STAY
Nature's first green is gold
Her hardest hue to hold
Her early leaf's a flower
But only so an hour
So leaf subsides to leaf
So Eden sank to grief
So dawn goes down to day
Nothing gold can stay
----------------------------------
Every time I read this, I think about what is "gold" in my life right now, and try to treasure it more closely. I realize that Hope won't carry around the same Strawberry Shortcake book forever, or that Jonny won't always want me to cuddle with him at bedtime.....GOLD.....
What's gold in your life right now?
Saturday, October 30, 2010
Tuesday, October 19, 2010
Safe at Last
That's what I think of now when I think of my father-in-law. He's truly safe forever. Nothing can touch him - disease, sorrow, anger, and most importantly, the attacks from the enemy. What a wonderful place to be.
I'm waaay down south right now, the Gulf of Mexico to be exact. Very near to the place where he died just a few months ago. I'm here with Aaron, the kids, and my dear mother-in-law. There are times when I swear, I turn around, and almost see him walking down the beach to me with that familiar gait and tilt of his head. He'd be smiling with "that look" that meant he had something to tell me that would make me throw my head back in laughter.
It's awful to be without you, Poppy, but so incredible to know you are safe and you are waiting for the rest of us.
I'm waaay down south right now, the Gulf of Mexico to be exact. Very near to the place where he died just a few months ago. I'm here with Aaron, the kids, and my dear mother-in-law. There are times when I swear, I turn around, and almost see him walking down the beach to me with that familiar gait and tilt of his head. He'd be smiling with "that look" that meant he had something to tell me that would make me throw my head back in laughter.
It's awful to be without you, Poppy, but so incredible to know you are safe and you are waiting for the rest of us.
Friday, October 15, 2010
Friday in a Quiet Classroom
"Let the beauty we love be what we do.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground." - Rumi
Hello out there. I'm sitting at my desk, looking out at 18 empty student desks this morning. They are all at a retreat at Camp Shamineau and I will spend the rest of my morning trying to focus on planning and preparing for the next full teaching week. Okay, yes, I'm procrastinating. Grace, please.
Yesterday they were gone, too, and I'll admit - I was a little bored. The morning went so slowly without them. I've fallen hard for these kids I didn't even know 2 months ago. I love them, I do, with all their weird ways, acne, squeaky voices and bad jokes. I love their total vulnerability, and the drama that only a middle schooler/high schooler can understand.
I was pretty skeptical going in -- wondering how much my heart could actually hold. I had loved students once upon a time, in a place that now feels like a dream. And it's different, but somehow very much the same. I still love with abandon because I have no choice. It's a spiritual act that I cannot explain. God simply plants those little souls inside my heart.
I am humbled. Honored. It's overwhelming to think of the responsibility I have each day to walk with integrity and honesty before not only my own children, but now these 35 that look to me each day. So help me God.
There are hundreds of ways to kneel and kiss the ground." - Rumi
Hello out there. I'm sitting at my desk, looking out at 18 empty student desks this morning. They are all at a retreat at Camp Shamineau and I will spend the rest of my morning trying to focus on planning and preparing for the next full teaching week. Okay, yes, I'm procrastinating. Grace, please.
Yesterday they were gone, too, and I'll admit - I was a little bored. The morning went so slowly without them. I've fallen hard for these kids I didn't even know 2 months ago. I love them, I do, with all their weird ways, acne, squeaky voices and bad jokes. I love their total vulnerability, and the drama that only a middle schooler/high schooler can understand.
I was pretty skeptical going in -- wondering how much my heart could actually hold. I had loved students once upon a time, in a place that now feels like a dream. And it's different, but somehow very much the same. I still love with abandon because I have no choice. It's a spiritual act that I cannot explain. God simply plants those little souls inside my heart.
I am humbled. Honored. It's overwhelming to think of the responsibility I have each day to walk with integrity and honesty before not only my own children, but now these 35 that look to me each day. So help me God.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
Mary Beth Chapman: Choosing To See
Since I'm currently reading Choosing to See, I had to share this with you. Chapman's book isn't exactly what I thought it would be. I can't remember laughing out loud at a book as much as I have with this one. Mary Beth shares so much of her own insecurities that you can't help but fall in love with her.
And then, of course, she shares about the accident that took her daughter, Maria. The actual font of the book changes, symbolizing the complete metamorphosis that took place in their family, the difference between then and now.
It's a book of encouragement and raw beauty as she shares her whole heart, not just the pretty parts.
Friday, October 08, 2010
the peace of wild things
I've never been a nature girl, but there are times when being outside, in "the peace of wild things" as poet Wendell Berry puts it, is exactly what the soul needs.
Last night, our little family took a walk down to a river close to our house, and just hearing the crackle of leaves, the sound of each child's voice combined with the scent of Autumn was simply delicious. I had to find this poem and share it....
When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake rests in his beauty on the water,
and the great heron
feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
"The Peace of Wild Things"
by Wendell Berry
Last night, our little family took a walk down to a river close to our house, and just hearing the crackle of leaves, the sound of each child's voice combined with the scent of Autumn was simply delicious. I had to find this poem and share it....
When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children's lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake rests in his beauty on the water,
and the great heron
feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
"The Peace of Wild Things"
by Wendell Berry
Monday, October 04, 2010
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